Dear 2011, the year that was.

Oh how the times do change. This year has been great. Ok, so I don’t have the job I love (yet!), I didn’t win the lottery or get engaged to Richard Armitage (yet!). But I can honestly say that 2011, you have been good to me. Before we hit 2012, here are 12 things that 2011 taught me:

1. Things can only get better. This time last year I thought that things could only get better because they couldn’t get any worse. I know that things can only get better in 2012 because the foundations have been laid in 2011 for a great year and a great future.

2. Good times and bad times make a friendship. They say you learn who your true friends are when the shit hits the fan. But you also learn who really cares when things start coming up roses. Also you can stay friends with someone, even if they have buggered off to Australia. In-depth conversations about Buffy the Vampire Slayer are go! 

3. Having direction brings positivity. This year I finally realised what I wanted to do with my life. Or, more accurately, how I wanted to pursue it. In only a matter of weeks I will be starting a course, training as a make-up artist. This thrills and terrifies me in equal measure.

4. Never go back. Whatever old feelings might come crashing back, the past doesn’t change. Always move forward. Like a shark. Let it go and you open yourself up to much cooler things.

5. Personal style is important. I always used to say that I didn’t really care what I looked like, that what was inside was what mattered most. At the same time I didn’t want to look like everyone else. But this year I took control of my appearance. I threw away every item of clothing that I didn’t like, didn’t suit me, didn’t wear. I started to think about what I wore, how I did my hair. I started to think about what I bought. I bought and wore only things I loved – both new and vintage. It’s amazing how much a bright outfit that you feel really good in can make the day start in such a great way.

6. Dancing is essential to life. Not only is the best work out ever – I know this because I ache the next morning – it puts you in the best mood! No matter how crap your day, how tired you are or how blue, shaking it on a sticky dance floor to epic tunes will fill you with joy. Don’t even get me started on Zumba!

7. People are inspirational – find them. I have found such inspiration in the following blogs: GalaDarling.com (check out her book Love & Sequins – too good!); A Beautiful Mess; Bangsandabun.

8. Kundalini Yoga is an addiction. It just makes me feel so good – so calm and exhilarated afterwards. I’m totally addicted to it. I’m not the world’s greatest runner, this is much more my thing. I still try to run at least once a week though. Exercise really does make you feel great in your own skin.

9. Natural beauty is the ultimate. I use raw cocoa butter from Akoma which I melt down in silicone cupcake cases with a drop of olive oil and a few drops of essential oils. I use it as a massage bar and it is a delicious treat. Also, Lush facial skincare has been wonderful to me.

10. TV steals your soul. All right, that’s a bit dramatic. But I live in a house with people who worship the great soap trinity: Eastenders, Coronation Street, Emmerdale. I’ve always watched them too. Out of habit I flick on the TV when I’m cooking, cleaning, generally whenever I enter a room. I’ve well and truly shaken that habit and I’d encourage you to try it. These days I live for Doctor Who, Merlin and Downton Abbey (which jumped the shark big time, which I sort of love) but otherwise I rarely watch TV. It’s freed up so much time for exercise, writing, reading and chatting with friends.

11. Validation is important. Much as you might tell yourself that you are talented, much as your friends and family might agree, there is something really powerful about being told you’re good by a stranger.

12. Positivity breeds delight. Nothing is so awful that it can’t be faced. Look for the good and you’ll find it as surely as you’ll find the bad.

A new career.

I started this blog just over a year ago when I was unemployed and determined not to let it get me down. A lot has changed over a year. I got a job – not the job I wanted, granted, but it put money in the bank and paid my bills, which makes me luckier than many.

But over the year I’ve been thinking hard about my next step. Do I throw up my hands and just accept my life as it is? Do I hell. Quitting isn’t really my thing. Admitting defeat comes after the last resort. But the time had come for a re-think.

I knew what I loved. I knew what I loathed. I knew what I thought I would love to do every day and I knew what would make me want to leap out of the nearest window. So after months of thinking, I came to a decision.

I’m never giving up writing, it’s just what I do. Even if nothing I write makes it onto shelves, screen or stage, I’ll still do it. But I have decided that I’m not really designed to write for a living – it’s far too solitary a pursuit. That’s why I wrote so little when I was unemployed – when I’m busy and purposeful, I write so much more. So I had to figure out what job I wanted to do.

And I did. On Saturday, I put my deposit down and in January I will be starting to train as a make-up artist for tv, theatre and film. I am so excited by this. At the open day on Saturday, I was fascinated by everything and really appreciated being able to talk to the tutors and students.

I also decided to learn to drive. As a Londoner, I’ve never really felt the need. It’s just another expense, parking is a nightmare and it’s just so easy to get eveywhere by bus or tube. But if I can drive I’ll be able to take on so many more opportunities, I won’t have to worry about whther or not the trains will be running.

And it means that one day I will be able to fulfill my life time ambition of owning a Mini Cooper. But that’s by the by.

I feel like a year ago I was a totally different person. I have had such an incredible year and I already know that 2012 is going to be even better.

So, as I said before, the blog will probably change in the new year. I’m planning to do a weekly post about my course and also blog about the people and things that have inspired me this year and spurred me on. Things are in the pipeline.

Thanks to everyone who has read and commented on this blog over the last year. I’ve really appreciated it

Play it again

(Also known as – Announcement Number One)

A few months ago, a friend found a very small advert in the local paper. Angle Theatre were looking for new submissions. You had to submit three scenes with no more than five characters. Thankfully I had quite a while before the deadline because I totally blanked on ideas.

Then, on an incredibly hot summer day, I printed off my scenes and promptly decided to scrap one scene and write a new one. So I didn’t really hold out much hope given that I took it straight to the post office before the panic set in.

So off my little play went and I promptly forgot about it because I’m of the opinion that my thinking about it and worrying about how it is received doesn’t help anyone, least of all me.

Then last month I heard back. Not only did they like my play (!) I had actually made it onto a shortlist of six.

*Keels over*

Unfortunately, I received this news at work. We have recently been taken over so it’s likely that I scared my new boss because I totally freaked out.

I heard again this week that they won’t be producing my play in their January season as it’s not finished. However, they want me to finish it by 30th November in the hopes that it can get taken on by someone else.

But the absolute BEST news? A masterclass at the National Theatre Studio. So looking forward to this – I’ve only just finished reading about how they developed War Horse in that studio – and I’ll get to meet the other five on the shortlist. Will definitely be telling you all about that. There will be exclamation marks. You have been warned.

C-c-changes

(With apologies to David Bowie)

A lot has been happening in good old real life lately, but I haven’t been sharing them on the blog because I’m wary of jumping the gun. I mean, it’s one things to ring up your family and mates in a babbling mess, but to announce stuff on your blog can be very embarrassing if nothing comes of it. And, as we know, I am nothing if not proud.

So coming up over the next couple of days are two big announcements. The first is a stroke of luck that still has been pinching myself and I am so excited, I can’t describe it.

The second announcement is something that I’ve been considering for a very long time. It may also lead to a change in this blog as I will be a world away from the reason I started this blog in the first place. Life is about growing, shrugging off old skins and trying on new ones. I would like this blog to grow with me. But that’s for another post…

I have split my announcements into two posts so as not to bombard you. I have had an excellent weekend, I hope all of you have too. Really looking forward to sharing this stuff over the next couple of days!

The Weekend That Was

I once said that I’d grow up when Harry Potter did. And guess what, people? According to the films, he’s barely 18! (Epilogue? What is this Epilogue of which you speak?)

This weekend, I saw the final film. I loved it. I told myself I was going to enjoy it and not pick it to pieces like I normally did. And I did enjoy it. There were two things that I really think they should not have changed (Neville’s hero moment and the final Harry vs. Voldemort showdown – won’t say how they were changed for fear of spoiling people). But then they included something that made me squeal (again – won’t say what because of spoilers). Thank you to Janice for putting up with my continued crazy.

And actually, thanks to J.K. Rowling and everyone – actors, crew, production, special effects – who created these films. I seriously think Rowling needs to be my home girl. I know that when I start shouting Expecto Patronum at shizzle, she’d be down with it.

But enough of Harry Potter! I have a life outside of Hogwarts, you know. (Oh the ways you can interpret that sentence).

In other news:

I have given up on Camelot – nothing on earth should be that big a disappointment.

I like writing like a demon.

I am yoga-ing to my heart’s content. Hello, abs!

I already know my week off is going to be fab. It’s going to start with a dye job, which may or may not be utterly ruined by Bikram Yoga. We shall see.

And next weekend I’m seeing my first midnight matinee at the Globe. Can’t wait! Swiftly followed by a vintage fair. What more could a girl want?

So you know those moments where you think “Well, Bradley James has yet to declare his undying love, but apart from that life is pretty sweet”? I’m having a lot of those moments lately.

P.S. For some reason I can’t comment. Who knows why! So – DOT, just to say I agree with the comment you left. Humbug indeed!

So this is my job.

Yesterday I had my first day working the reception solo. It was an evening shift and it was relatively quiet so that was good to ease me in. I think I did ok, I haven’t had any phone calls today to say I managed to totally screw up the system yesterday. I take it that’s a good sign? There’s a couple of things I need to go over again but otherwise I should be ok. I admit I was really nervous. But practice makes perfect!

It was pretty slow, so I will be certain to keep a notebook with me so that I can write once I’ve got everything I need to do done on the quiet days. I’m no shirker, but once I’ve prepped for the next day and there’s no one waiting, no tidying or faxing to be done, it makes sense to occupy myself. I think I’ll work on some short stories and reviews until the end of the year.

I am so grateful for this job and the freedom I suddenly have. I can give cash to charities which I like to do at Christmas, especially now that I’ve been blessed with some good fortune, it’s good to pass it on. I also got a thrill when I spotted something so perfect for the Pal and knew I could get it for him. I also treated myself too, to some clothes that I could also wear to work.

And now that I can stop worrying about finding a job and having enough money in my savings to dodge the dole, I can think about other things. Pray silence for the Things to Do Before the New Year list:

• Clear out wardrobe, give clothes to charity.
• Clear out bookshelves, give books to charity.
• Sort out the files under the bed.
• Sort out this year’s bank statements.
• Sort out a writing/running schedule for the New Year.
• Sort out make-up, throw away old/unused stuff.
• Type up handwritten notes.
• Clear up computer, documents, photos, emails.

This is a yearly list. I like to start the New Year fresh, with the decks totally cleared. Everything I don’t want or don’t use anymore is either recycled or given to charity, I try not to throw things away if I can help it.

Friday is my day off so I’ll start then. This weekend is mad busy, can you believe it’s the last one before Christmas? Vulpes Libris will be on hiatus from this Sunday until the New Year, so I’ve also got plenty of time to put together some reviews. And as I’ve already sorted my outfit for the New Year, there are no more worlds to conquer! So roll on 2011!

The girl got a job.

So remember my “inspirational” post yesterday wherein I said that I was certain that 2011 was going to be great? Turns out I’m a touch more psychic than I thought because guess who just got offered a job?

I had an interview on Tuesday for the role of part-time receptionist at a private clinic. I didn’t mention it because I didn’t want to jinx it, even though I came out feeling that I had got it. I tried not to dwell on that and I didn’t mention it to anyone because well, you don’t want to look an idiot if you don’t get it. But I did, as of about an hour ago. Good money, good job and because it’s part-time I can still write and I fully intend to put myself about (um, publishing-wise that is).

This is just the early Christmas present I needed. I’m very glad that I didn’t go back to the Job Centre, although I told myself that I’d have to in the New Year, funds not being what they were a few months ago. So this is well-timed. I feel really good about this job and I intend to celebrate this weekend by dipping into my savings one more time. Well, I’ve got to have a work wardrobe, haven’t I? And an outfit for New Year wouldn’t hurt, would it? After all I am ushering in a great year!

So to those of you that are out of work and feeling a bit rubbish – keep your chins up! I know that is the hardest thing you can do right now, but if you do remain positive, you’ll write better applications, you’ll come over better in interviews. And remember – it’s impossible that you’re going to be in this situation forever. Every no is just taking you closer to that yes. And I know that this isn’t my dream job, but it’s keeping me going while I work towards my overall goal. It’s good to see the bigger picture, but it’s also worthwhile thinking about the brushstrokes, the steps between you and your dream.

I should probably point out that this blog isn’t about finding a job anymore. But I’m going to keep writing – about trying to get published and working towards the dream goal. Life is still full of challenges!